Record: 7-4
"They don't got people that can defend the rim. We're still more athletic than them and just got to be able to finish when we do."
That was sad. That was pathetic. That was disgusting. That hurt to watch.
How do Lord Voldemort and the Nuggets usually lose to the Timberwolves in the playoffs? Weak turnovers, apathetic defense, and a general sense of being overwhelmed physically. All that happened in Game 2. And it was way worse because the Nuggets went out on an and1 three-point bender in the first quarter to get a huge lead. Didn’t mean dick. Ugh. Goddamnit!
This game was about the Nuggets being soft and collapsing. It was not about Donte DiVincenzo being the best player on the court during the fourth quarter in a fucking playoff game. No, that was a secondary theme.
Did anyone play well on the Nuggets for the whole game?! Don’t give me this Limp Dick bullshit. He looked outclassed after the halfway point of the third quarter. One person on the Nuggets played consistently well for the whole game. Tim Hardaway Jr!
Jesus Christ, THJ was fantastic! Missed 2 of 3 free throws on his 3-shot foul while getting upset with Bones Hyland aside, THJ was being a man on both ends of the court. Completely unlike Cam Johnson, who still can’t catch the ball cleanly or do anything besides miss threes. Fucking David Adelman doesn’t know how to help the Nuggets have a defense that just prays for the Wolves to miss open shots, but David has the bravery to bench Cam Johnson’s faggot ass during crunch time so that THJ can show Cam what a man plays like. My goodness. Cam is starting to get shitty with the dipshit refs after Julius Randle punks his bitch ass around the rim, and it’s making me light-headed with rage right now. Goddamnit.
You look at the box score and besides the three-point marksmanship from THJ, the box score looks kinda similar to bitch-made Cam Johnson. The play was not similar. There was a 3-on-1 fastbreak for the Timberwolves after Brucey made one of the many terrible passes from the Nuggets that gave possession to the Wolves. A terrible turnover by Brucey that immediately followed THJ saving the ball from going out of bounds. So that was 2 great plays from THJ that don’t go in the stat sheet. Saving the ball from going out of bounds and drawing a charge on a 3-on-1 fastbreak. Here’s another one. THJ found himself marauded onto Julius Randle before the end of the half and found a way to induce Julius into missing a midrange attempt. That isn’t on the stat sheet. THJ was incredible on defense.
Bones called his own number on that 3-on-1 and made an obvious charge straight through THJ. Easy call. THJ got super excited lying on the ground and that was great to see. THJ and Brucey are the 2 Nuggets who get the most hyped after genuinely great plays. You could tell me that Brawny does that too, but Brawny isn’t playing like how his mom coached him to play right now so we’re going to dismiss Brawny’s screams to the crowd.
But yeah, THJ and Bones Hyland are clearly developing some real hatred for each other. You see it when Bones starts talking to THJ while THJ shoots free throws. You see it when THJ gets his ass down and starts guarding Bones at halfcourt. You see it when THJ hip checks Bones Hyland late in the third quarter when the Nuggets are in the penalty and THJ immediately raises his arm to admit guilt, even though that was a terrible foul far away from the rim. Yes, Bones Hyland was the defender who fouled THJ on his and1 three-pointer. Bones also found himself guarding Brucey during his first stint on the floor. Brucey got the ball and immediately buried Bones underneath the basket before making a layup. Brucey has a BOLO on Bones Hyland in the same way that he had one for DLo. Bones Hyland’s first stint on the floor was really bad but he made up for it during his floor time late in the third quarter where he made threes and free throws. Bones Hyland is the first person off the bench to high-five Donte DiVincenzo. Bones Hyland really hates the Nuggets. We see it!
Spare me this dreck about Limp Dick scoring 30 points and being good. He was excellent in the first half and bad in the second half. The stat sheet says that the Nuggets only had 9 turnovers. Watching the game did not feel like 9 turnovers. Maybe it’s the fact that all of the Nuggets' turnovers end up in breakaway dunks by Donte DiVincenzo and Jaden McDaniels. Maybe it’s the constant bobbling of passes by every Nugget. Who knows, but that “9 turnovers” is some American Propaganda. Shout out to the Nuggets stat keepers for lying to the public like the American Government.
The Timberwolves are doing that thing where they make you feel nervous whenever the Nuggets dribble the ball because you feel like the Nuggets are about to lose the ball. That’s Limp Dick’s fault! He’s doing it again! Yes, Limp Dick is abusing Ayo Dosunmu when he guards him. We know, but then Donte DiVincenzo guards him and Limp Dick can’t separate even with a screen from the Dark Lord! That’s so bad! Donte DiVincenzo did the most amazing job sticking to Limp Dick through ball screens during the fourth quarter. It was incredible. Donte has to be on the All-White NBA starting five. He’s taking Brawny’s spot. So that team is now DD, Austin Reaves, Alex Caruso, Chet, and P Rabbit. The team needs rebounding.
But back to Limp Dick, he was high-fiving every fan who was around him after one of his and1 threes. That was during the first quarter. Yes, Limp Dick made an incredible heave from beyond halfcourt. That was at the end of the second quarter. Guess what?! To close the third quarter he allowed Kyle Anderson to tip a pass attempt out of a trap and that led to a Bones dunk. Then in the fourth quarter with the game on the line, Limp Dick tried to make a highlight around French Rejection and threw the ball out of bounds. Limp Dick was trying to embarrass French Rejection like Lord Luka does. No! There was also a moment where Limpy found French Rejection switched out onto him and decided that the best play in that scenario was a dribble stepback three over French Rejection. It missed. There were other mismatches. There was time on the shot clock. God knows who was stuck on Lord Voldemort. Probably Jaden McDaniels who absolutely can never be stuck on Lord Voldemort if the Timberwolves want to win. Really, it was a bad second half from Limp Dick. Don’t get it twisted.
Lord Voldemort was not good. He airballed two threes and missed six of seven attempts. We can’t say that he was bad because he made some close shots and threw great passes for direct layups when he was standing below the top of the three-point line. But that was not good. He’s obviously not making threes but less obviously, the misses that the Dark Lord has around the rim are really detrimental because the Wolves rebound it and start a fastbreak that usually ends in a layup. There were a lot of misses! Bitch ass Cam Johnson isn’t going to protect the rim without fouling. Same for Brawny.
And this Nuggets’ defense is disgusting. As previously mentioned, they’re just hoping that the Wolves miss open threes. Because if the Wolves pass it around and perform some pass or shot fakes, they’re getting an open freeway toward the rim. It was so gross that David Adelman had the Nuggets play zone. The Wolves have trustworthy shooting. You can not zone up the Timberwolves. Anthony Edwards, DiVincenzo, Naz Reid, Bones Hyland. Those guys perfectly swish open three-pointers. Completely the opposite of bitch-made Cam Johnson and Brawny.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Brawny had one corner three where he pointed to the Wolves bench afterwards. Fuck you Brawny. How about you win a game making threes? Because your injured ass is not inspiring fear in the Timberwolves hearts at the end of these games. Not like Donte DiVincenzo is WINNING THE GAME in Denver. Talk to me when Brawny makes a three in the fourth quarter or goes to the free throw line down 2 and makes both free throws. Goddamnit! There was a rebound opportunity between Brawny and Donte DiVincenzo. Who do you think won that? LOL of course DD did! Just off of balls.
Brawny got chased down by Anthony Edwards. Bitch-ass Cam Johnson got chased down by someone. Same with THJ. That’s another part of these Nuggets when they play the Timberwolves. They get chased down like ten-year-olds and you see it coming. Every once in a while, Brawny will remember who the fuck his mom raised him to be and dunk the fucking ball with some goddamn conviction, but Brawny got seriously injured this year and his screams to the crowd are more about him trying to make himself believe that he is the white warrior that his mom coached him to be in AAU.
Here’s a personal preference, I don’t like the wing combination of Cam Johnson and this injured version of Brawny. It’s too soft. It doesn’t have balls. Cam is just out there missing open threes, bobbling catches, fouling at the rim and throwing shitty passes. Brawny is still mentally recovering from a serious ankle injury and is playing slow, not dunking like he should, and missing open threes. There’s not enough athleticism in that pair. Not enough strength. Not enough rebounding. Ugh.
Jonas Valanciunas looked spry at the start of his time on the court. He bent down to pick up a loose ball! But then the dipshit refs started calling him for every possible foul and David Adelman lost trust in JV. David needs to keep trusting JV to come back out during the fourth quarter. The Nuggets need rebounding. In that second half, the Wolves were getting way too many offensive rebounds. Shout out to bitch-made Cam Johnson!
Nagini had a runout in the first quarter where he did a self alley-oop. Cool. He missed a lot of his other shots and when he goes to the free-throw line, it looks like he’s hoping. His feet are too close together on his free throws.
Fuck the Nuggets. That was a dispiriting effort at home. This game was extremely sloppy. Especially during the third quarter. Teams were just missing and running. Missing and running.
Anthony Edwards is going to take all of the credit for that Wolves win. He was terrible in the first quarter, bad in the first half, and good during the second half. He looked super sweaty with 4 minutes left in the first quarter. There were some knee grabs that are now happening every game. Halftime happened and then Anthony Edwards started playing like a completely different player. It was almost like he underwent some sort of chemical transformation during halftime.
These step-throughs that Anthony Edwards does after stopping and pivoting are out of control. Tony Brothers did a great job of calling Anthony Edwards for traveling twice during the end of the game, but please, Tony, call those step-throughs as travels when they happen. I need it. We need it. The world needs those to be called.
The best Timberwolves offense is still Donte DiVincenzo coming off a screen-handoff from French Rejection. Lord Voldemort drops back way too far on those and you trust DD to swish that open three. You also trust Limp Dick to get stuck on the French Rejection screen. You also trust Anthony Edwards to have no clue about this little strategy tidbit because he’s the picture of American Laziness. Anthony Edwards doesn’t think about strategy. He’s an American! He’s spending 4 million dollars building interceptor missiles while the Iranians spend 30 racks on a drone to take down a fighter jet! Doesn’t matter to Anthony Edwards though! He has the American taxpayer! Anthony Edwards has a reputation to protect. He has to “save face”. Fuck Anthony Edwards.
Jaden McDaniels left to go to the locker room before halftime but he came back and showed us how physically meek the Nuggets are. He has a quote about the Nuggets being “all bad defenders”. Yeah, Jaden. I’m talking the same shit! The Wolves get easy shots. The Nuggets get hard shots. Military spending aside, that’s a tactical asymmetry that is hard to overcome! Talk your mess, Jaden!
Listen, Julius Randle’s stats were good. He was doing more of the physical forays towards the rim that end with a shot attempt, where he moves forward and not backward. Alex Rodriguez gave an excited chest-bump to Julius after the game, but this was about Donte DiVincenzo. The plus-minus tells the story. Donte was refusing to be screened. Donte was making threes. Donte was getting rebounds like a motherfucking MAN! Fuck, Donte DiVincenzo was ALL DICK in that game. Just amazing. He’s a playoff warrior.
CELTICS 🍀 (-14.5) over Sixers 🔔
- I picked the Sixers last game. It hurt. I’m not picking the Sixers again.
SPURS 🤠 (-11.5) over Blazers 🌲
- I’m watching this game because I’m a big fan of Bear Jew. The Wembanyama. The Blazers need to make threes and their players aren’t good shooters.
Rockets 🚀 (-4.5) over LAKERS ⭐
- LMAO if the Lakers win again. Niggas are going to be traded if the Rockets lose this game.
